I love seeing all these pics! The one of you on the toilet made me laugh. And I know exactly what you mean about being a private person and hesitating to share anything personal. I also struggle with this. But sometimes sharing the difficult stuff can loosen its grip over you. I mean, the loss of a loved one, especially a parent is devastating, and it's okay to feel crappy and give yourself time. Even if you can't get back to being completely carefree, you can still get to a good place.
I'm here at the beginning stages of losing my dad, if anything like this can be called a stage. How about the first months. I don't want to give you advice exactly, since everyone sort of establishes their own personal journey. Personally, I'm in a space filled with shock in which I'm dealing not only the loss of my dad, but knowing that this loss has changed my soul. It sounds like you're grappling with that same reality.Maybe if we accept each day, or at times each moment, as it is, and be more forgiving of ourselves we'll work towards something that can feel better. My love to you, darling.
You are so pretty! Love these pictures. Can't wait til our vacation. XO!